A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.
The cop asked to see the blonde's driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. "What does it look like?" she finally asked.
The policewoman replied, "It's square and it has your picture on it."
The driver finally found a square mirror, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman.
"Here it is," she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop.
There is NOOOOOOOOO way to top that blond joke, so here is the next best subject--lawyer jokes
Q: How many lawyer jokes are there?
A: Only three. The rest are true stories.
Q: What's wrong with lawyer jokes?
A: Lawyers don't think they're funny and other people don't think they're jokes.
Q: What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?
Q: What do you call a lawyer gone bad?
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and an onion?
A: You cry when you cut up an onion.
Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 70?
A: Your honor.
Q: What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?
A: His partners.
Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: His lips are moving.
Q: What do you have if three lawyers are buried up to their necks in
A: Not enough cement.
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?
A: The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
Q: What do you get when you cross a bad politician with a crooked
A: Chelsea Clinton
Q: How does an attorney sleep?
A: First he lies on one side and then on the other.
Q: What's the difference between a shame and a pity?
A: If a busload of lawyers goes over a cliff, and there are no
survivors, that's known as a pity. If there were any empty seats, that's
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?
A: When you die, a leech will stop sucking your blood and drop off.
Q: How do you get a group of lawyers to smile for a photo?
A: Just say, "Fees!"
Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Three. One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the
:laughing: :laughing: :laughing: :laughing: :laughing:
Ok one more dumb blond joke that the yankees can relate too...
The Blonde and the Snow Plow
It was snowing heavily and blowing to the point that visibility was almost zero when the little blonde got off work. She made her way to her car and wondered how she was going to make it home. She sat in her car while it warmed up and thought about her situation.
She finally remembered her dad's advice that if she got caught in a blizzard she should wait for a snow plow to come by and follow it. That way she would not get stuck in a snow drift.
This made her feel much better and sure enough in a little while, a snow plow went by, and she started to follow it. As she followed the snow plow, she was feeling very smug as they continued, and she was not having any problem with the blizzard conditions.
After quite sometime had passed, she was somewhat surprised when the snow plow stopped and the driver got out and came walking back to her car and signaled her to roll down her window. The snow plow driver wanted to know if she was all right, as she had been following him for a long time. She said that she was fine and told him of her dad's advice to follow a snow plow when caught in a blizzard. The driver replied that it was OK with him, and she could continue if she wanted... but he was done with the Wal-Mart parking lot and was going over to K-mart next.
Come to think of it, it does sound more like a Rebel situation when there is 2" of snow on the ground in the deep south.