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THE FARMER

Old Seth goes to the doctor to see about his erection problems.

"I'll be ridin' the tractor on the south 40, Seth told the Doc, "and the warm sun and the tractor vibratin' gets it up!" But by the time I can get back to the house and Maw gets ready, it's down--and I can't get it back up. Can you give me somethin' to help keep it up?"

The doc says no, I can't. Age carries its price. But--perhaps some signal could be arranged and Maw would be prepared as you arrive at the house? Maybe Maw could even meet you halfway.

A great idea! says Old Seth. There's a little grove about halfway to the house from where I'm plowin'. Me and Maw used to have sex there when we were younger! It'd be a great spot. I'll carry my shotgun and when it's all up and hard, I'll fire it and she'll get there same time as I do. Thanks doc!"

Time passes.

The doctor meets Seth at the bank one morning and asks how he's doing. Seth says he's okay. The doc asks how Maw is, and Seth says, Poor Maw, she's dead!

Sorry to hear that, says the doc. How did she die if you don't mind me asking?

She just run herself to death durin' the Pheasant season said Seth.
 
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